Saturday, June 5, 2010

Hidden

This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 11; the eleventh edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.


When i asked you "How were you doing?"
Your success replied me

When i hugged you in appreciation,
The Pepe and Levi's hugged me in turn 

When i walked with you
Your Nike made strides

When i asked you academic doubts 
Your MNC tag laughed at me  

When i asked you for time
Your TAG Heuer answered me

When you hosted a party in Taj
The luxury received me

When i called you in dire needs
Your iphone replied me to call later

When i received you at airport
Your superiority pushed me aside.

When i proposed for an Irani chai,
The coffee day interrupted me

When i expressed about my passions
Your Achievements made you deaf

When i asked you to listen,
You were listening to social networking

When i shared my weighing problems
Your head weight ignored them

When i was at my low
Your pride was glad for that

When i was in the wrong direction
You had encouraged me
When I was in the right path
You had warned me

When i asked you all these things
You asked me, "Dont you have self respect?"

Where were you my friend?
Hiding in between Brands and Tags
Anyways, were you hiding from yourself too?

Finally , when i fell down in life
Your wicked smile revealed
the hidden enemy in you, My Friend!!!


I am not grudging against you,
because


When I congratulated you,
My Jealousy did it

When I hugged you
My envy did it

Whenever i called you
My Stomach was burning

Whenever i gave you a pat
My malice did it

When you received me in Skoda
I couldn't digest it

When you missed your promotion
I celebrated it with others

We were friends, in theory.
You thought i was budging
but i was making nimble moves

It wasn't about my failure
It was about your success
It wasn't about my success
It was about your failure

I was not trying to climb up
I was trying to bring you down

Now, i too got success,
Let me unmask myself
It is time for my TAG Heuer
to show my real stuff

Whenever we smiled at each other
We were more hidden than real but
The world  still knows us as best friends
..............
..........
...........
........

Claude Louis Hector has wisely said, "God, save me from my Friends, I can manage my Enemies".


The fellow Blog-a-Tonics who took part in this Blog-a-Ton and links to their respective posts can be checked here. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.
## Also, wrote for 3WW @ budge, nimble, theory

48 comments:

Ritu said...

Wonderful! So true .... every line drips with irony

Rachana Shakyawar said...

@ Mahesh

What a beautiful notion..!
I like the second right side version. You have well defined the quote..and the dwelling feeling of the virtual desires and a so called friendship in this competitive world!!


~ Actually I'm lacking in right kind of words...as you have so well expressed in each and every line..with every word used just so apt with all those perfect brand names...Everything sync so well with the feeling, thought and idea behind the Hidden Agenda of the post :)

Well done!!
~ Keep the Spark ALive..

Shilpa said...

Wonderful!!!

The Fool said...

Interesting. And well presented. But why so bitter? Is it based on a real life experience?

Shilpa Garg said...

Wow!! So very true... happens, sadly! :(

Ramesh Sood said...

From my web page,as my comment to this absolutely fascinating write. Mahesh..

Everyone applauded, and I couldn’t
I couldn’t take his success in my stride
That’s when something inside me snapped,
Oh! I was living without being alive.

My goodness.. you have written so well..quite true.. someone has rightly said.. A friend is someone who can tolerate your success..

ThomG said...

great lines and great construction.

magiceye said...

hard hitting...
straight from the heart?!!

wonderfully expressed

Roshmi Sinha said...

You have laid bare the essence of most 'friendships'... the way the are these days. Now that we are in the thick of 'Kaliyug'...

"I was not trying to climb up
I was trying to bring you down"

Very apt!

No wonder... 'kabaddi' is our national pastime!

Tuppence said...

A mahesh classic. The bitter truths of some materialistic shallow realtionships. The longer the truth about them remains Hidden, the more it hurts. Looks like in your post you have depicted that the realization has come soon .
liked the second half of your post.
Nice thoughts mahesh and I liked your take on the topic .

gkam said...

Highly innovative and loved it!

All the best for the contest :)

My Blog

Beyond Horizon said...

Oh....dis is simply innovative......cool 1....no doubt d 1 st half is gud......d second half (shudnt say awesum bcoz it hurts wen ders such relationship)....is awesum bcoz ur words makes eager 2 read ahead......its indeed HIDDEN....but revealed d INSIGHT......

Mahesh Kalaal said...

@ Ritu ji...
Thanks for the pat :)

@ Rachana...
I know very well, it is not that easy to comment on such topics...
Yea, there is much behind the Hidden.
now a days relationships are driven by materialistic accumulations
Even relationships are competitive.
Thanks for the appreciation buddy :) .

@ Shilpa..
thanks buddy :)

Mahesh Kalaal said...

@ Fool...
Thanks for the pat buddy.:)
Rather than calling it as real life experience, i would say it is real time observation as at one point of time we face atleast few of the things mentioned here...
And why bitter? Sometimes, hidden things are quite bitter and harsh and hence they were being hidden

@ Shilpa Garg...
Yea, its quite happening... we need to take care of our friends aka enemies

@ Ramesh Sood ji...
Thanks a lot for the pat and the responsive feedback .

@ Thom G...
Thanks a bunch for the appreciation Tom :)

@ Roshmi...
I do agree with every word you said. For you it is kaliyug and for me it is consumerism.
Thanks for the encouragement and the analytical feedback(kabaddi) buddy


@

Mahesh Kalaal said...

@ Tuppence...
Classic!!! OMG, its a feather in my cap.
You are correct, the intensity of pain and the hidden truths longevity are proportionate to each other.
Thanks a lot buddy for the feedback and the encouraging pat :) . Keep dropping by :)

@ gkam..
Thanks for the words buddy :)

@ Beyond Horizon...
Thanks for the good words buddy. You have aptly linked the owrds Insight and Hidden.

Mahesh Kalaal said...

@ Magiceye...
Welcome to wisdomism..
YEa, foe me it is hardest hitting.
Straight from the heart? Well that is quite tough question to answer.
Yep, it is indeed from the heart and so are most of my posts. I have drawn most of the things from observations rather than experiences.
Thanks for the pat buddy :) Keep dropping by

Nethra said...

It's so true, but I share a healthy relationship with my best friend. Might be its true with few other friends.
Very nice poem! :)
I'm surely consider it for voting.

Richa Sharma said...

This is for sure going to be the most different and best take on the topic.
Its plucked from the harsh realities of life and ur presentation is fantastic.

Kp writing n good luck !!

Leo said...

a very different, innovative take! well written! :)

Leo - Hidden

anupama said...

Dear Mahesh,
Good Morning!
The truth about friendship is well expressed in your post!Really good1
Someone somewhere who you unnoticed,
Must be waiting for a good word,
a pat and an embrace!
He/she has the strong and sincere gift of love,
Which is unconditional and everlasting!
Sunday is the day;a time for introspection!
Life is still beautiful since a true friend lives for you!:)
Turn around!
Wishing you a beautiful Sunday,
Sasneham,
Anu

Life

Brijender Singh said...

Stings,but very true !
The vindication could have been a little less vindicative,though !

Gyanban said...

I think this is one of your better works.The central philosophy has been embedded very well. Good stuff, quite like it.

Sourav C. Pandey said...

This was good, except it had many grammatical errors, and hence it failed to create a rhetorical read!

Am being honest, have been reading your lot of comments everywhere, I have a personal question, why do you keep giving negative views on everyone's blog, I have read your blogger profile, 2-3 blog posts, and they all have blatant errors! We are all learning and can never be perfect, but too much of negativity and high thinking about oneself STOPS the process of self-improvement completely! I hope you don't get me in a wrong way, and realise what you are doing should be done in a better positive way! Instead of trying to CORRECT everyone by finding their faults, try to be appreciative of what they wrote!

Thanks and all the best! :)

Hidden...in love with me and life! :)

Mahesh Kalaal said...

@Nethra...
You are quite lucky then. But, it might be true for few people. It is not generic one.
And am pleased by your decision:) :) :). Thanks buddy :) :) :)

@ Richa ...
Thanks for the response and the pat buddy:)

@Leo,
Thanks Leo:)....Yet to read your second hidden post.

@ Anupama...
Welcome to Wisdomism ...
Sasneham....is this Telugu word?
Thanks for the detailed and analytical feedback with sunday as a means.
Your feedback is quite unique and warm with lots of optimism and positive thinking. Yes, sure, am turning around. Lets hope for the good.
Thanks for the wish and have cheerful blogging.

Life :) :) :)

Mahesh Kalaal said...

@ Brijender...
Hi buddy, yesterday i told about your post on Escape in BAT10. You wrote it very well. Am yet to read ur post in BAT11.
Thanks for the feedback:)
Vindication!.......Sure, I will work on it.

@ Gyanban...
Thanks for the pat and the encouragement buddy :)

Tavish Chadha(sensible-bakwas.com) said...

Mahesh, you deserve a huge round of applause for this... way to go man... a straight from the heart post... keep them coming... i really love what u right only because u write from deep withing... keep it up my frnd...

Cheers!
Tavish

- The Virgin Author! said...

Now, this was an absolute amazing post, Mahesh. LOVED IT! Count my vote for this post! Very well thought, and presented!

PS: Some better formatting the next time, please.

PPS: All the best for BAT!

PS: http://bit.ly/thestupidgirl

Mehak said...

wow! amazing! i especially loved the second part of it..

Scribbling Girl said...

wow ur truly an amazing writer.
U truly gripped me till the end....
And been seen such fake frndships i can so relate....
surely love this write
Awesome this was

Mahesh Kalaal said...

@ Virgin author...
Thanks for the pleasant surprise buddy...
wow....am elated....thanks a lot for the pat and encouragement...
Yes, sure wil make my coming posts better formatted...
Thanks again for the feedback:)

@Tavish...
Hey buddy....you got me right...it is straight from the heart and am glad that you have said that....thanks for the encouraging pat buddy...
btw, loved ur recent 55ier :)

Mahesh Kalaal said...

@ Mehak,
Thanks for the pat buddy and yes even for me the second half is favorite one :)

@ Scribbling Girl...
Thanks a bunch for the quite encouraging words and the appreciation . Am humbled .
loved ur feedback...
Yes, every one of us might have went through such fake friendships .
Thanks again:)

pieceofpie said...

i liked the dark and light side of riding this adventure of everyday with my best friend... truth serves a delicious platter! umbilicus

Amity said...

What a thought Mahesh!

When I ask you now how did you write this? I may not be your friend at all!

When I tell you now your take is unique, we may be friends now...:)

Very, very nice one Mahesh!

Good luck for BATOM!!!

Anonymous Someone said...

it seemed like something happened all of a sudden. Really justified the title. Like the conscience pounced out from hiding to confess that I was just like you, but both pretended outwardly.

Remarkable, am out of words for this. It literally stormed me.

Regards
Blasphemous Aesthete.

Raghav said...

Whan I thought nothing in this world can be changed,
Your blog inspired me.

Megha said...

wow..that was so unique and just like hitting on the nail.....
very nice...

Siddhesh 'Ravan' Kabe said...

The blogger ossumess zone has a new king!!!

m (_ _) m

ULTIMATE, speechless!!!

Mahesh Kalaal said...

@pieceofpie...
well said..it is indeed riding an adventure. Thanks for the response buddy :)

@ Amity,
Interesting questions..
Thanks for the feedback buddy :)

@ Anonymous Someone...
Thanks a bunch for your constant support and encouraging pat. Am elated buddy:)

@ Raghav ...
:) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)

@ Megha..
Thanks for the feedback Megha
:)

@ Sid...
Bows!!!
Am already on Airtel tower....
Bows!!!
Really, now, now its my turn to become speechless :) :) :)
Thankssss budddy :) :)

Raksha Raman said...

I totally loved it! It is ironical, satirical and sarcastic! It unfailingly conveys the mood of the character/poet and the emotions hidden therein! Good one! All the best with BAT :)

Kena said...

Mahesh,

In which world you are living.... come to this side..... when you look into your past. You will find so many......... And I am glad I have some great friends in my life. It is an ugly thought. Even if you pass some of the friends like this just ignore 'Forget and Forgive'.

-Kena

Mahesh Kalaal said...

@ Raksha Raman...
Thanks for the feedback and the response buddy :) . Keep dropping by. :)

@ Kena...
Hey buddy....chill!!!
I am very much in this world.
First of all, i didnt go to that side either. I have been this side since years. :) :) :)

It is just a fiction. I have no where said that this is my personal experience or i support this thought. I even didnt say that all friendships will be like this.

If someone writes a crime story, it doesn't mean that he supports murders or he participated in a murder.

Betrayal happens not only in friendship, but also in love , marriage, relatives and any other relationship. In this case, i chose betrayal of friendship to write about. Thats it.

This post is written for a blogging competition.

In every relation there are good and bad equations. I didnt generalize that every friendship will be like this.

Out of 10 friends , there may be one person who comes under the category and i have written about that one person. It is just a literary work and not at all aimed at personal experiences. It is an outcome of my personal observations .

Even i have a big list of best friends , not only in the past, but also now. I am pretty happy with them and am glad that they are in my life. They are supporting me in whatever i step i take. They wish for my well being. I am indeed blessed lots of best buddies

Yes, you are correct in one thing. I forgot and forgiven those ugly minded friends long back. Exactly, i just ignored them, though they try to poke their nose into my life.

It is just a story buddy. A simple instance of one shade of pseudo friendship. A story where two pseudo friends try to betray each other. Thats it. I didnt throw malice on friendship here, but i portrayed false friendship.

I am not sure why you are so excited . Do you think that i dont have best friends in my life?

BTW, most of the responses here are from my best friends and friends like you.

To make you clear again, it is just a literary work of an instance.
Hope you understood my intention now.

I guess, you are living in this world too :) :) :)

Thanks for the feedback and intriguing questions ... :) :) :)
Keep dropping by with your opinions which enables me to elaborate my intentions and convictions in a much rational manner.

Kena said...

It can change the way we look at people. One will see the post and what if he did not read your comments after...??? Any way I am signing-off.

Kena said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Mahesh Kalaal said...

@Kena...'

If someone starts doubting his relationship/friendship just because he read this post , then it is not friendship/relationship at all...

We have many movies, books on betrayal in friendship.
We read and watch news on such incidents. So, it doesn't mean that everyone changes his way of looking at people . In that case this world will be at chaos.

One need not read comments to understand the post. All have responded by only reading the post and then commented. It all depends on the individual and his personal experiences . Sometimes it reflects our mindset too.

I am not saying that your point is invalid. It may be true that people may change the way they look at people, but it should not impact their relationship if it is true relationship with trust.

It at all impacts, then no doubt it is a false relationship/friendship .

Deeps!! said...

Mahesh!! You have me so stunned at this marvel of an article..!! it has truth dripping from it... and sooo well managed!!

simply awesommmme!!

Mahesh Kalaal said...

@ Deeps...
Hi...Welcome to wisdomism.
Thanks a bunch for the thumping appreciation and the resonating response. Keep dropping by buddy :)

Mural! said...

interesting post mahesh, very well presented, I would have stopped reading halfway otherwise if not for your style of writing :)

Mahesh Kalaal said...

@ Murali...
Hey.....thanks for the pat buddy :)
Am glad that it made an interesting read. :)